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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25370254">Bigger Than Myself</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/CasTheCactus/pseuds/CasTheCactus'>CasTheCactus</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Sanders Sides (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Modern with Magic, Alternate Universe - Supernatural Elements, Angst, Class Issues, Crossdressing Janus, Developing Friendships, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Father figure Patton, Gen, Internal Conflict, Just some fun times ahead really, M/M, Magic, Magical Races, Moral Dilemmas, My First Fanfic, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Burn, witchy stuff</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 09:47:23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,912</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25370254</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/CasTheCactus/pseuds/CasTheCactus</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A "weak-ass" human like Virgil knew he'd never mean anything to a world of powerful witches, beautiful vampires, and all manner of unique peoples. Hell, just getting through school or keeping a part-time job was hard enough through all the bullying and beatings— especially when it was the one and only king of high school, Roman, who had it out for him.<br/>He didn't know how his only friend and fellow red-blood, Patton, managed everything so well. Yet... though he‘s told this is his role, something inside Virgil refused to accept it.<br/> <br/>So when Janus, an eccentric unlicensed witch and his trash-bag of a werewolf friend Remus offer him a chance at something more, Virgil is thrust into a dark new world, making decisions and choices he never knew he'd have to make. Of course, every power comes with a price.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Evening Blues</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Virgil sat alone against the dumpster. His cola-stained work apron lay crumpled on the dirty concrete as he slumped over, working at fresh grime in his one good pair of jeans.<br/>
The only sounds he could hear were the faint passing of a car or the occasional shifting of pigeons overhead, and though not much light could reach him in the tiny alleyway, the orange glow cast on the roof opposite signalled Patton would be getting worried any second now. Dammit. Virgil rested his head against the bin and closed his eyes. He had to go back soon, but knowing his best friend/ guardian, Pat would be on him with worry the moment he walked into their apartment anything less than dandy. Some times he could deal with the guilt. But not today. He couldn’t do that to him today.<br/>
No, instead he sat cold, lonely, and sore behind Billy’s Belly Burgers, ignoring a fresh batch of darkening bruises and rapidly mounting exhaustion. Weak-ass...</p><p>“Rough day?”</p><p>Virgil startled. </p><p>“You don’t look so hot, kid.”</p><p>Pushing his fringe from his eyes, Virgil turned and blinked at the figure suddenly beside him. It was a man... or, maybe not. The person leant resting against the brick wall, tall and imposing, with light stubble, knee-high platform boots and a bowler hat that offset from some kind of <em>grunge-office chic</em> outfit they had going on. Judging by the geometric tattoos jutting from beneath their leather jacket, as well as the fact he hadn’t even heard them approach, the creep was a witch. Probably an illegal one, knowing his luck. They certainly had too many tats to be licensed.</p><p>Hah, today keeps getting better!</p><p>“I don’t have any money,” Virgil said, shifting away and trying to steel his gaze back to his pants. </p><p>The witch laughed a little. “I’m not looking for your money,” they said with a languid, faintly-accented tone, “don’t want it.”<br/>
When Virgil didn’t respond the figure pushed off from the wall, moving towards him. “Virgil Sanders, I presume?” Brown eyes suddenly shot up again, wide, confused and afraid. The witch smirked and crouched down to meet his gaze. “The name’s Janus, and I’d say, I’m more interested in <em>you</em>.”</p><p>Old combat boots scuffed on concrete as Virgil backed away, brows lowering and shoulders tensing. He opened his mouth, before shutting it and gritting his teeth instead.<br/>
Who the void did this witch think they were? ...Was he about to get kidnapped? Trafficked? <em>Harvested</em>? For a moment, the pair stared in hanging silence, the younger of the two vehemently wishing his curse-warding beads hadn’t been taken a few days before. Almost a minute passed until eventually Janus’s expectant features fell and they rose with a huff. “Great high <em>soul</em>, you’re ridiculously less intelligent than I thought you’d be,” they turned and fiddled with something in their sleeve, “are you this stupidly human all the time?” At this, Virgil stood up. The witch looked back, a twinkle in their eye as they raised his thin brows and smiled again. “Shame... I was just here to help you,” They pulled a string of brightly coloured hand-blown beads from seemingly nowhere, and tossed them in the human’s direction. Virgil fumbled for a second, but caught them, “What- Wards?” </p><p>“I thought you needed them?”</p><p>He looked between the brand new set of (pretty damn well-made) protective trinkets and the stranger, “Have you been stalking me?” </p><p>Janus breathed a laugh, “Not exactly. Like I said, I’m interested in you, kid.”</p><p>“I’m not a kid.”</p><p>“Well, you’re something,” they considered for a moment, glancing at the setting sun, “I can... tell you more if you come with me.”</p><p>“Why the fucking void would I do that? You’re probably gonna like, hack me up for parts.”</p><p>Janus sighed, “I thought my gift of goodwill would be proof of my intentions enough, dear. Couldn’t hurt you if I tried.” They softened their gaze, turning back to look Virgil in the eye, “I want to help you.”</p><p>Virgil scoffed.</p><p>“Honest!” They paused here, looking away as if it think. When they spoke again their words were laced with sincerity, “You’re sick of being weak, aren’t you? The bullying, the discrimination, those- <em>looks</em>, the fact everybody is better than you? I guarantee you, I want to change that.” Without looking up, Virgil stilled slightly, as if caught on a lure. “There’s something unique about you, Mr Sanders- I know, even among your red-blooded friends you’ve never fit in. Have you never thought about the reason? Truly, all that interests me, and all I want to do with you, is feed your potential to be something more. No dismemberment, no curses involved.”</p><p>Again, quiet settled. Virgil lowered his eyes further and picked at his thumb with a finger. His breath was slow and shaky as Janus’s eyes bore into him. A siren passed. </p><p>“Fuck off, sicko.” In a burst of emotion, he clutched tight around the ward, the familiar tickle of abjuration magic in his palm telling him it was working like it should. “I’m going.” A pause. “Nice murder pitch.” He shoved past the taller figure, away from the wall at his side of the alley and towards the lamp-lit street. Before reaching the footpath, a force pushed on his hoodie pocket and he stopped.</p><p>“Just my card, not-kid,” Virgil reached in, fingers brushing a small square of card stock, “if you rethink things, I’ll be waiting.”</p><p> </p><p>+++</p><p> </p><p>By the time he got home the sun was well below the horizon, and the night sky was shrouded with dark grey cloud.<br/>
He and Patton lived in an old, urban, motel-turned-apartment-block in the middle of town: the sort that had outdoor concrete walkways littered with forever-drying laundry and old cigarettes, and the occasional yelling match that woke you up at night. It was was a big building, though, so at least it was easy to find in the night. Mostly.<br/>
Virgil stood exhausted after climbing several flights of stairs, his fist idling as if to knock on their apartment door. His headphones weren’t working and the bruise on his cheek was on full, blotchy, green-ish display— everything felt like pounding, icy death.<br/>
He cursed himself for forgetting his apron, and therefore keys, back behind work. They had nothing worth stealing, so that didn’t matter. It was more that he now had to alert Patton to his late arrival, instead of slipping through to his room and under his blankets like usual. Plus, it was past midnight. And at this age he’d learnt not to brave it outside. </p><p>Regardless he spent almost fifteen minutes hesitating, anxiety pumping through his veins, before he heard a muffled call from the other side of the door, then footsteps, and a fiddle of the lock inside.</p><p><em>Shit</em>.</p><p>Harsh light hit Virgil as a short, light-haired individual pulled open the front door. Immediately his arms shot up to shield his eyes and he winced. Someone said something. But it was a good few moments until Virgil could focus on anything enough to hear. He blinked several times. </p><p>When his vision cleared, Patton was in the the doorway looking up at him with teary, worried eyes. His fluffy curls were ruffled and on-end, and his blue eyes were shot and<br/>
bagged. He didn’t even have his favourite ‘quick-night-emergency’ slippers.</p><p>“Virge? Virgil answer me where were you?” He asked a second time, voice high-strung, looking for anything wrong with his friend. His eyes widened when they reached the marks on his face. “Oh soul, what happened?” Without thought Pat’s fingers moved to the biggest injury. </p><p>Immediately pain flared in Virgil’s cheekbone at the touch, and he swatted the hand away. “Ow- No, Pat I just- I got... caught up and I- It’s-,” his breath caught, tears pricked at his eyes. “Can we just go inside?”</p><p>Patton looked to his flatmate’s eyes, “Sorry, yeah.” He gathered himself. Nodding as Virgil walked through, he moved to the side of the cramped entrance, then closed the door, locked it, and inhaled. When he turned around his features were calmer, though still strained in worry. “Just... are you okay, Virge?”</p><p>“Yeah.” </p><p>Pat’s brows furrowed. “You really don’t look it, kiddo.”</p><p>Virgil shifted, resting his hand on one shoulder and picking at his thumb. He hated seeing Pat like this, but the tightness in his chest made it so hard to speak.<br/>
He didn’t want his best friend to worry. Or pity, either. Though, more than being the being beat up, he was still tense after mulling over thoughts of the not-quite-man witch’s words in the alley the whole walk back. He didn’t know what to think of it, yet. A small unread card and a set of beads still sat in his pocket. “I’m fine, I just wanna go to bed.”</p><p>Thinking for a second, Patton surveyed Virgil, and when we spoke his voice sounded much more level. Virge, of course, knew this as the ‘dad-bud’ tone. “You can’t just come back after midnight, almost five hours late, with a bashed in face, and expect me not to worry. You can’t give me nothing like that, kiddo,” he stuck his hands in his back pockets, “I’d thought... I’d thought something really bad happened,” he muttered.</p><p>“It was just a misunderstanding at work, that’s all.”</p><p>“...We both know it wasn’t.”</p><p>“Yeah, well, that’s old news.” Virgil stuffed his hands in his pockets and moved across the tiny living space towards his room.</p><p>“Virgil that doesn’t tell me why you were this late. Please.”</p><p>“I got lost.”</p><p>“You’re not... doing drugs, are you?”</p><p>“What?” Virgil looked back, now slightly annoyed, “Of course I’m not fucking doing <em>drugs</em>.”</p><p>“Then what were you doing?”</p><p>“Nothing.”</p><p>Patton stepped forward, “Im not against you, Virge. I’m always here. You know you can talk to me.” </p><p>“I know, just, it was really nothing. I got caught up after work, that’s all.”</p><p>“Doing what?”</p><p>“<em>Nothing</em>,” he breathed.</p><p>“This is being silly-“</p><p>“<em>PATTON, NOTHING IS WRONG</em>.”</p><p>Pat’s lip quivered. He said nothing- just looked virgil straight in the eye with an emotion almost akin to betrayal.</p><p>“Sorry- I just. I’m okay, I promise,” he sighed, “look, I’m just gonna go to bed.” He felt both exhausted and terrible, but it wasn’t like he could do anything about it. As Virgil spun to his room, he stopped and the bin and pulled out the small business card. He looked at it, about to toss the thing.</p><p>“What’s that?”</p><p>Virgil stopped. Then, instead, he read the square of paper between his fingers. It was simple, white, and populated only with three centred lines of small type in neat, shining black ink.<br/>
<em>‘Janus Carlille, here to help. The snake vase beside All Magic Supply, downtown. The door is open.’</em></p><p>“Virgil what is that?”</p><p>“It’s nothing,” he said quietly, absently re-pocketing Janus’s card. “Night.”</p><p>Virgil left to his bedroom. </p><p>Patton stood for a minute, maybe more, still and unsure which direction to move. Eventually, he rotated to the opposite, and stepped towards his own room.<br/>
With his head down, he said to an empty room, “Sorry for caring, kiddo. Love you too. Goodnight.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>
  <em>He protec<br/>He attac<br/>But most importantly<br/>he make sure Virgil get bac<br/>...home safely</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Seriously, though, thanks for taking a look at this humble fic!<br/>I haven't written in ages, so we'll see how this goes. I hope you can enjoy this little world I've created for our favourite boys (and beings of other indiscriminate genders) and whatever happens along the way.<br/>Anyways, I'm planning to update this fic as much as I can between school, which will likely end up being one chapter every week or two, until I reach my planned ending! Though I don't know just how long this will turn out, I'm looking a pretty longform story. </p><p>Please yell at me should you see a typo or whatever else, and of course, even the smallest of comments and kudos mean the world to me! </p><p>Stay cool ;)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Update</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Hey guys! This is just a place filler so that the fic updates properly. I edited the original preview snippet I posted on the 17th to a full and finished chapter today, and of course I can’t leave that sitting around without notifying anyone!</p><p>This will be deleted as soon as chapter 2 is released. See you then! :)</p>
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